Updated: Oct 18, 2019
Disclaimer/Really a note to my momma when she reads this: This is not personal, and has nothing to do with our relationship. You are a perfect mom. No one will ever come close to you. I love you to the moon and back.
^That is a result of Black parenting! and no I'm not scared😅 😅
Between my brother, sister, and 50-leven cousins, whoppings were a regular part of my childhood. Whether it was the result of a lie, not doing well in school, or simply acting a plum fool in a public place, I knew all too well that some of these actions could result in a demand to get a "switch off the tree." This was just one of the many discipline approaches my mom and aunts used with the goal of raising little black children into great people.
While I have no doubt in my mind that our parents loved us with all of their heart, and made unimaginable sacrifices, I'm unsure if some of the discipline practices like whooping or the "do as I say not as I do" tactic, or instilling fear to gain respect were as beneficial as they'd hoped.
At least that's what Yolanda Williams, a certified positive certified discipline, says.
Yolanda is a single mother of a toddler and the host the Decolonizing Parenting Podcast. When she's not chasing her almost 2 year old toddler around, she advocating for the safety and liberation of black children from white supremacy. Yolanda says, that much of how we parent in the black community is rooted in fear, some that she saw growing up.
" The way that my mom did certain things sort of created in me these toxic beliefs about myself, and I don't want my child to feel this way" says Yolanda. "Now I want to do all the things I can, to really empower her and make her a confident person."
Yolanda is a co-leader on a platform that focuses on conscious parenting, that was created to be safe, supportive space for black parents to openly discuss how racism, white supremacy, and systemic oppression impact parenting choices for black families, how to work to overcome generational traumas, and how to be a more conscious parent in order to raise culturally, socially, and intellectually liberated children.
In our conversation, Yolanda is unapologetic about serving the black community and providing tools to grow free black children into healthy and whole adults. Listen as we discuss some of discipline pitfalls and parenting practices that actually hinder your children from becoming confident and social emotionally healthy adults.