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Confessions: The people, places, and things that have NOT served me well as a Black woman

Updated: Mar 12




There is an interesting dynamic with the things I love, cherish, and long for; things like my faith, my friends, and men. I have witnessed and experienced the greatness and the depth of these things when they show up and operate in full love, support, and truth as they claim.


You know, when the church shows unconditional love or when your tribe of girlfriends are real friends in the darkest of hours, or when my male counterparts protect and ride for me privately and publicly.


This is what I love about the church, my tribe, and men.


But there is something about how these same things, the church, tribe, and men, also support the silencing of women’s authentic experiences.


So this week, I am being very intentional about having conversations that center women’s experiences in spaces that traditionally do not serve women well.


Oftentimes these spaces create a balancing act that put women at a cross road of making a decision of which part of our identity will win today. Will it be our faith, our gender, our sexual preference, or our truth?


And quite frankly, I simply got tired of using my already limited mental and emotional energy, deciding how I should show up in these spaces...these spaces that show me deep love one day but the next is questionable. For this reason, I believe these the church, tribe, and men have work to do and have not served me well as a black woman.


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